Observations from Troy Lane

By Cousin Chuck

Pat the flower girl at Martha and Ed's Wedding

In my early years of life Pat and I did not have the opportunity to spend much time getting to know each other except for the many enjoyable family gatherings when everybody present had a blast. 

In my teenage years though, Frank and I  spent quite a bit of time together doing some of the things we both enjoyed like playing Chess, playing music, sports, and sharing the company of friends we had in common. This caused me to be at his house more often and therefore got to be in Pat's company more often and got to know her a bit better. Here are some of the things I got to know:

Pat loved to read. Often Frank and I would offer her to sit and spend time with us hanging out, but more often than not she declined the offer so she could spend time reading the next book on her wish list to read. Off to her room she went to read her books.

Pat didn't think of herself first. When she sequestered herself in her room to read, she always asked me and Frank if there was anything she could do for us...food, soda, etc.  before she left us. I always appreciated that she did that.

Pat was intellectually gifted. Maybe it was all the books she read or the embedded thirst for knowledge but she always seemed to know a lot about everything. Frank was/is no different! They both were cut from the same piece of granite! I never expressed this but I viewed them both like Einsteins. As you know, great minds don't always agree and some times I witnessed the Clash of the Einsteins. 

Strongly expressed points of view but they stuck to the subject Never diminished to a personal level. Never about personal stuff...only about things like....does X x Y= 1/3 power of pie times 4. No way I could contribute to the discussion cause I certainly didn't have a clue! Above my pay grade. I never witnessed any animosity because one or the other couldn't make their case. It only made them spend more time researching the topic to get the correct answer. 

Pat liked to share her knowledge...One time while at her house I was discussing with Frank that I needed to do a report for school about the Civil War, specifically about the battle of Vicksburg. I didn't know where to begin my research because keep in mind there wasn't an internet at the time. Pat offered to get some info for me and two days later she came to my house with about 30 pages of info copied from the library that proved very valuable in completing my report. I got an A for the report thanks to her help.

Pat was Pat... She had her strong beliefs and convictions and was not concerned about criticism. I am not talking about anything personal here or anything that's family. I am referring to the way she viewed life, the world, and the way she thought things should be. She also did not hold in disdain those that may not agree with her but instead invited those that disagreed to engage in intellectual discourse so each may be able to understand each other better.

Pat loved her family. I did not know that she had cancer until a family event at her house about 6 months after she knew herself. This came as a shock to me because she looked so well. She accepted things like a warrior...she was prepared to fight and not give up! 

In an unguarded moment she confided to those present that her greatest concern was that her children were not going to be adversely affected without her and that all were going to be ok. She so much expressed her love for her husband Tom who had dedicated himself for her well being despite the fact that he had his own medical issues at the time. Do you get it...she was more concerned with her family's well being than herself. She earned herself a free pass to be with Jesus.  

Flower Girl Pat

To all those in the Kuhr, Cetnarowski, and Sobierajski families..my most sincere condolences for the passing of Pat. Let her be the example of how each of us should meet adversity head on. God rest her soul! Miss you.

Chuck